What a week

Vacation is such a wonderful thing! Relaxation, fun, depending on the season ... sun, traveling, laughing, smiles, good times, family, friends....

And yet, Vacation can be so cruel. Short. Ending when it seemed like it just started. Financially broken. Late nights. Sleeping in. Returning back to work.

lol , I have been back from my Vegas vacation for geeeeze, (had to really REALLY think about it) 3 weeks!!! (double checks calendar) yes... 3 weeks... and my sleep schedule is STILL off! As is my workout schedule and motivation to do anything really. Work? Psshhhh, I spend my morning B.S'in on text, FB, Yahoo, IM, coffee, gossip, zoning... lol man its so hard to recover from vacation!!!

But I am determined to get there. Its almost midnight, and Ive been telling myself for an hour now, Get to bed!!! Tired.. yes but not enough to crawl my butt under the sheets! I keep saying to self...Self, how are you going to get up at 6am to run, exactly?? You can barely get up to get ready for work!

I swear, there is some determination in there somewhere... i think its buried under the poolside memories, right next to the Panera Bread breakfast sammich.. mmm that bread was off the CHAIN! yum..
prob explains my weight plateau. Seems to climb up and hang there longer and longer before dropping back down ... *swears its just that time of month... everyday for the past 2 months* yeah.. that's it. YUP!

All jokes aside, I realize I do way to much in my daily life. Balance. Hard to obtain. Hard to maintain.

If I could get everything done everyday, I'd be one damn happy perfectionist camper! lol

Work a full time job, cook breakfast for the boys before work, cook dinner after work, bake and decorate cakes, BLOG, FB, tweet, Check in on my foursquare accurately, cake research, read up on running a small business, update my website, work on my logo, write poems, spend family time with the boys - movies, games, outdoor time, work out, run, culinary classes or school (part time of course!lol) , basketball games, football training camp, dance lessons,and clean(purposely left that for the end)

well.... *scratches head* I can sleep when I'm dead right?!

So yeah, balance. Realize, I cant do it all... I CAN pick days to do certain things and work it that way.
Honestly, I think I have ADD! lol makes sense tho, my oldest was diagnosed with ADHD. My dad always told me i should have been born with a second set of arms and hands because I always try to do too much.
My friends have fondly referred to me as "superwoman". Most heard comment about my life from those who know me " I don't know how you do it!"

Neither do I, I just - do.

:)

Next post, I'll have to tell you about my FIRST NY Yankee game!!! Wish I got pics tho :( phone has no flash on the cam and it was a night game. either way, GO YANKEES!

X's and O's

Jasara

post delay

I really wanted to post yesterday but again, work and life had me busy! So ill probably post twice today!

I noticed that Im an end of the day kinda blogger! lol I am fortunate enough to be able to read the blogs I follow in the early morning then come 4 or so my time... im ready to blog. Must be this thing they call work interfering! lol

With no cake due now this weekend, I can relax a bit, enjoy the Easter weekend and plan out my next cake, the Lion of Zion for my friends husbands 40th birthday. Its a Reggae theme birthday as he is a huge lover of Reggae and Rasta!

Hopefully I get my router that comcast promised me after my threats to leave for Direct-TV.

Im giving them until Saturday. Im so done with Comcast!!!!

Then I need to figure out this school thing... am I , am I not. *sigh*

I think I need some qt to really think about this and ponder my next step.

Its not raining out here in the Bay Area and supposed to pour on Easter :(

but despite the rain, Im going to have a GREAT weekend!

X's & O's

What a day!

Again.. im soooo busy. no time for anything!

disappointed that the fundraiser cake i worked on was canceled the day it was due (yesterday)

My Co-workers are quite happy tho.. Chocolate cake heaven.

Now im going back and forth with another customer who doesnt want to pay and wants to cut corners for a cheap cake but I really dont think she realizes the time and effort and cost that go into my cakes... and so Im raising my prices. Talk about frustrating.

On top of that, she wants it Sunday and if we dont agree on something today, it might not happen!

Im also trying to figure out school and what way to go with it.

looking into apprenticeships at local bakeries.

Still have to sketch out the next two cakes due...

working while searching things on google and Cake Central...

checking emails and I still have to send emails out.

Oh did I mention I havent eaten but a banana today?!

Fumes.. running on fumes.

Why cant a day consist of 48 hours? 8 to work, 8 to sleep and the rest to handle all the To Do's in life!

Oh well, all I can do is focus on now. What can I do NOW?

And thats it. :)

I got the sweetest card from one of the teachers from Educator Appreciation Week! Pic to come!

Hoping everyones mid week is movin along!

X's and O's

Positively speaking....

Be the most positive person in the room you are in...

A person who says it CANNOT be done should not interrupt the person DOING IT!

Before you know your soulmate, you must first know your soul.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

Opportunities are never lost; someone will take the one you miss…

In the time of your life, live. - William Saroyan

Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got. - Janis Joplin

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. - Buddha

And the trouble is, if you dont risk anything, you risk even more. - Erica Jong

If we change within, our outer life will change also. - Jean Shinoda Bolen

Inspiration

Im inspired to write today. Its been a while and Im ready to release!

Reading my friend Justin's Facebook status just now got me thinking... he stated;

Thought through all of this growth I'd find but lost myself again - only to realize that's the point. We're never the same thing twice...

and that got me thinking.

We are like a rose bush. We bud and mature thru the growth process, we bloom into a new beautiful being, and as we do so, as we learn and grow part of us dies. It leaves us and we hope its only the negative and sometimes its goodness too but then we regenerate. A rebirth. We become anew once again. And the thorns on the stems are the trials and tribulations of our life. Pain, suffering, sadness and depression, and yet, the stem between the thorns is smooth and vibrant! When a rose is in full bloom, its like us at our peak at that time in our life. Not at the peak of our life as I believe, we go thru phases and when we reach that peak, everything is great. Lesson learned. Then the road continues and we continue to travel this path called life. Until we bloom again.

I was also thinking how tomorrow is never promised. I read somewhere a long time ago; "why do we hold on to things and save them for a special occasion or for another reason we deem worthy?"

Who's to say that special day will ever come. Whos to say tomorrow will ever come? Realize, Every Day is WORTHY!! I say, dont save anything, use your fine China for dinner every night! Wear that dress just because you want to feel good! Wear your pearls, try something new, pick up a new hobbie, volunteer, write a book, conquer a fear!

Live your life, no one else can do it for you!

Surround yourself with positive. Positive people, vibes, environment. Keeping negativity in your life will only keep you down, hold you back and define you. Remove the negative, and positivity can only surround you. Ofcourse no one can completely remove negativity and I think what remains is necessary to remind you, to push you, to motivate you.

So, I think I want to blog...

because I have so much to say and I have alot going through my head ... why not? right?
hmmm, well I guess this will be my test as I have a poetry blog, a business blog and a soon to come Instructional food prep blog.
So, who am I. I am Jasara. 30 years old, mother of three, Radiology scheduler, amature baker who is aspiring to become a Master Cake Decorator.... *sigh*... married to a failing marriage, daughter, sister and aunt. Amongst other things.
Im just finding self recently.. the process started 4 yrs ago... I laugh thinking about that. Man four years is a long time but I guess when you are already in a life created, its a small fraction of time. Anyway, 4 years ago I knew something had to change and if it didnt, mysery would follow me all the days of my life. I was in a bad situation with my husband, family life was only picture perfect to the outside world. No one knew what life was like nor had been like for the past 9 years. Not that details are necessary now but lets just say, it was time for change and change in self was where it had to start. it was a slow process in the beginning. Doubting, wondering, stressing, but I only grew stronger thru each month, each year and now I feel I am finally in control of my life. For once. So 2010, you are mine! Documenting my Journey into self, into a new career, into a new me! Im excited for me! Arent you? :)